Process in Nanning: January 4-11

THE DAY we arrived at the MingYuan Majestic Hotel, January 4, is mostly a blur. We were jetlagged and arrived around noon, meaning we needed to try to stay awake for the rest of the day in order to quickly recover. We first ate lunch at the nearby "buffet" restaurant, then rested for the afternoon. We walked a little bit to stretch our legs and stay awake, then met other members of our group for dinner at the hotel's Garden Restaurant. We slept fitfully and awoke sometime between 2:30 and 3:00 AM, still jetlagged and very anxious to meet Sydney.

Eating in Nanning
Michael and Sarge, our CCAI representatives, warned us only to eat in restaurants within the MingYuan "compound," which we discovered included three hotel restaurants and the hotel bar, the "buffet" restaurant right next to the Majestic Hotel, and the Guangxi Minority Restaurant behind the hotel. The compound also included a few other hotels and a nightclub, but the Majestic was the nicest of them all.

With the exception of the Garden Restaurant, the restaurants served traditional Chinese food and offered few amenities for the Western eater -- perhaps a single picture menu, sometimes silverware, and very few English speaking staff. For some of our group this arrangement presented a real difficulty, but for others, like us, this presented an authentic Chinese culinary experience. We felt safe eating any of the prepared food and drinking anything bottled, so we avoided illness and enjoyed some very interesting dishes. While some of us were disappointed at being unable to sample some of the food stand fare, our CCAI representatives wanted to keep us healthy; and, after all, the trip was about Sydney, not about our culinary adventures.

But we recommend trying as much of the "approved" cuisine as possible. It's quite healthy and a real favorite of the girls!

"Gotcha" Day and End of the Harmonious Period
Before we received Sydney at the Lottery Hotel on January 5, 2004, we completed the adoption certification and notarization paperwork. We did this as a group and got to know one another a little bit better. Indeed, the group in which we traveled became our support group for the entire journey -- and, for some of us, the trip inspired lasting friendships. After all, what better support than from a group going through exactly the same experience!

Between the "gotcha" moment and the following morning was considered the "harmonious" period. As we understand it, this is a period during which we decided, for sure and finally, whether we would accept our match. Of course, barring only the most catastrophic circumstances, everyone accepted the match! But our adoption became official January 6, 2004, only after notarizing our adoption documents, returning to the Lottery Hotel, and taking an oath to support and protect our new babies. Thus ended the hormonious period, although no one considered anything but the "gotcha" moment as the beginning of our parenthoods.

Department Store and Pizza Hut
By Wednesday we all needed baby supplies! Monday and Tuesday were experimental days as we discovered what Sydney did and did not like to eat, play with, sleep with, etc. Wednesday our group headed to the grocery store and the department store (we had already visited a nearby market several times) to purchase staples. We found diapers, the right formula and rice cereal, teething biscuits, toys, and an inexpensive stroller. The toys, stroller, and teething biscuits are still in use, while we have shifted to Western rice cereal and formula. We concluded our shopping experience with a visit to Pizza Hut, also located in the department store.

Shopping in a Chinese department store is an adventure not to be missed. The process employs many people and requires a good memory, as purchases are made in one place and picked up in another. We picked up the system quickly and soon decided, albeit a little cumbersome, the process ensures excellent service.

And this was the first day we heard Sydney laugh -- music to our ears.

Provincial Museum and Shopping
Thursday we toured and picked up memorabilia and souvenirs. We visited the Provincial Minority Cultural Museum, which showcases the several minority cultures that make up the Guangxi Zhuang Autonomous Region. Largest among these minority cultures is the Zhuang, which lends its name to the official province title. We hoped to find some information on Sydney's ethnic background, but we discovered few clues while learning a great deal about the cultures of Guangxi.

Following the museum trip, we enjoyed shopping for minority and ethnic arts and crafts. Here we purchased many things for Sydney and for her grandparents and other family members -- things we hope will be very meaningful to Sydney as she grows up.

"Typical" Farming Village
Friday we visited a farming village about an hour outside of Nanning. As Chinese economy and culture transitions from agrarian to industrial, from rural to urban, the concept of a "typical" farming village becomes more difficult to capture. However defined, the lifestyle of the rural villager is a far cry from that of urbanites in Nanning. The visit opened our eyes to the possible, perhaps probable, lifestyle Sydney would have endured had she not been abandoned and adopted. The women undertook many of the village's backbreaking tasks while also cooking and cleaning. We saw many of these activities and wondered how they managed. The adults were aged, but the children were innocent and wide-eyed.

Visiting the village was a sobering experience, but it affirmed the life-giving choice we made to adopt.

The Orphanage
Our last full day in Nanning we spent visiting the Yongning Social Welfare Institute, Sydney's orphanage. This visit both sobered us and affirmed our decision. The orphanage presented gifts in response to our purchase of the two clothes dryers; the presentation overwhelmed us. While we struggled to decide how much exposure Sydney should have to the orphanage after becoming more comfortable with us as Mom and Dad, the experience was well worth it. Sydney was abandoned at the gates of the orphanage, and we now have pictures to show her where that was.

The orphanage is relatively modern, but it takes driving over some difficult roads up hills to get there. Sydney's birth mother, whomever she may be, clearly worked hard to leave her at the orphanage. Abandoning her there was no accident, and that fact will be crucial for Sydney as she becomes aware of the price her birth mother paid to get her adopted.

We also visited other babies' places of abandonment, so every family that wanted to do so could get pictures and experience the place. Visiting these places of abandonment, while not officially santioned, it extremely important to adopting parents.

Overall, our experience in Nanning was among the most moving of our lives. Our CCAI representatives were superb in providing information, assisting us with paperwork, and taking care of us and our new babies. We will never forget the warmth of the people in the hotel and on the streets; we continually received smiles and warm wishes for the health and welfare of our babies as we walked through the streets of Nanning. We hope to return, for our own sakes and for the sake of Sydney, once she is old enough to understand the experience.